“The strength of a woman is not measured by the impact that all her hardships in life have had on her; but the strength of the woman is measured by the extend of her refusal to allow those hardships to dictate her and who she becomes. ~C.Joybell C~
Every time I read this I’m reminded that life isn’t easy. We get knocked down sometimes harder than others, but that’s no reason to lie down and give up. My autoimmune disease often makes me feel weak, flawed and broken. I’ve had days where all I can think about is how I’m running towards this finish line while being strapped by a bungee to a 45lb plate behind me, just pulling me back from reaching my goals. Then I stop and remember that I’m stronger then this disease. I’m going beat this and I’m not going to give up. I refuse to let this define the rest of my life or who I am. I don’t want to look back someday I realize I gave up on things I wanted to do because of this one little bump on my road.
Every time I doubt myself I look back at where I started, before I was diagnosed, and remember how far I’ve come, not just physically but mentally as well. The road hasn’t been easy so far; changing my diet, adjusting my work outs and trying to be stress free have been some of the hardest things I’ve had to do.
They sound simple but trust me, it’s harder then it sounds. Like this week I went to buy my English muffins that I’ve been eating on a regular basis and somehow managed to think they were gluten-free but this whole time they WERE’NT. I had a small breakdown to which my husband came to the rescue by finding Gluten-free ones that were in fact, delicious and low in carbs. This sounds silly, having a meltdown over English muffins, but when you cut out gluten, you can’t have your favorite cereal anymore. No more jimmy johns on the weekends. No more IHOP pancakes, no more delicious pizza. No more PB and jelly sandwich. And NO MORE olive garden bread sticks! Yes, there is replacement gluten-free breads, muffins, pizzas but trust me they are NOT the same!
It’s definitely bumpy, rough, and crooked road… but I’m on it and I’m not looking back!